Life Rambles: On Dieting.
Note: I’ve realized lately that I really want my blog to be more than just about the fashion aspect of my life. I have always been terrible at writing diary entries; from the tender age of seven, I’ve hoarded pretty diaries like a magpie pilfers shiny things, but I rarely wrote on more than ten of their pages. So I’m hoping to put more diary-like entries entailing things about my life other than what I’ve been wearing into the blog (along with pictures, if I happen to have some). I love fashion, and that will always be the primary focus of my pictures, but I want to write more about… life. I tend to censor myself unconsciously for some reason, and posts I start out writing somehow turn into monologues about what I’m wearing. Which isn’t what I meant this to be.
I want to share my life hereabouts, the highs and the lows, the fun and the struggles, hopes, dreams, work, adventures… everything. Because I’ve always meant this blog to be the diary I actually wrote in. So without further ado, here we go. A life-ramble. Because I need to.
Some of you know that I am currently trying to lose about 15-20 pounds. And before you jump the gun and tell me I look fine, let me say this: at 5’6″, I fluctuate between 160 and 165 pounds, and currently weigh more than my (admittedly slender) husband. I’m not saying that I’m grossly overweight, nor that I want to lose a zillion pounds to be model-thin. I just want to be healthy, and to conquer this weight that has stuck with me despite some of my best efforts.
And you guys, losing weight is hard.
Obviously, you probably already know this– nobody tackles a diet and says “Hey, this is going to be easy!” But somewhere in the back of my mind, even though I knew it would be hard, I suppose my eternally optimistic mind convinced me that it really wasn’t going to be all that bad. I’ve lost a mass amount of weight before. I cut sugar and white flour from my diet for four months and brought myself from 180 to around 155 by the power of self-control alone, so somewhere deep inside it felt like I’d be able to just snap to it and do that again.
Plus now, I’ve got the power of a gym membership on my side.
But it’s not a piece of cake. (There is no cake involved whatsoever.) Especially given the fact that I twisted my ankle right after I triumphantly weighed in at having lost a few pounds, and couldn’t go to the gym for two weeks. And gained it back plus five pounds.
People don’t seem to talk about the difficulties of dieting and exercising and being healthy. I’ve seen so many inspirational posts about how they triumphed, tips on how to stick with it, glory-stories with before-and-after pictures, but really… very few people divulge how much trying to lose weight can really suck. Especially at the beginning.
Because in the beginning, it’s the worst. I feel tired. I have a headache. I went to the gym yesterday to do an easy workout– bicycling at intervals of resistance 1 and resistance 4 for thirty minutes– and when I stood up I felt wobbly and exhausted. I have to refuse dessert when everyone else gets to indulge. I have no idea what to eat for breakfast or lunch most days. I’m drinking so much water I’m basically best friends with the bathroom.
And admittedly, it gets easier with time. But these first few weeks are going to be killer. And the hardest part will be practicing self-control.
It’s funny, because I can be incredibly good about what I cook– I can make myself great healthy breakfasts, lunches, and dinners– and I can have a healthy meal plan all worked out… but then I come to snack time and I am lost. Those chips come out, and I disregard all the work I’ve put into a healthy day and I eat the entire bag. I have great control when it comes to cooking, and terrible control when it comes to that can of Pringles– I can and have eaten an entire king-size candy bar AND a can of Pringles out of boredom–, or even just a meal that is healthy in moderation that I decide to eat more of simply because it tastes good.
Me and my portion sizes need some work.
So I’ve made a few lists that you can skip or read if you like. The first is my plan of attack for these first few weeks when I know that I will be ready to up and quit by tomorrow. (scratch that, I’m starving and ready to give up right now.) The second is a list of why losing weight sucks. The third, a list of why losing weight is totally worth it/my reasons for losing weight. I hope that this post hasn’t come off as too whiny, and I hope that you can be inspired to be healthy along with me even though sometimes it sucks.
Because I know that despite the difficulties of having a good diet and exercise, it will be worth it in the end, and I can do this. And so can you.
I’m going to put my lists after the jump. This post is already long enough.
I hope you all have a wonderful Tuesday! Thank you for listening to my rambles.
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Plan of Attack:
- Plan out and shop for a week’s worth of meals– snacks and (sugar free) desserts included.
- Have all of my snack foods portioned out, if possible, so that I can’t just grab the entire box of pretzels and eat them all.
- Cut cane sugar and white flour from my diet permanently, with exceptions for parties and such, but for a short goal, don’t eat either for thirty days, no matter the occasion.
- Visit the gym at least three times a week.
- Match my workout pace to the pace of the music I’m listening to, and up the resistance of my machine every time the song changes. (This actually is really fun.)
- Put post-it notes with goals and encouragement EVERYWHERE. But especially on the fridge.
- Drink water if I get cravings.
- Only eat when I am legitimately, stomach-growling hungry.
- Make lots of snacks at home– hummus, guacamole etc– to eat while Mr. Owl eats his chips and whatever else he eats that I can’t have.
- Moderate my portion sizes religiously.
- Make it a priority that half of my plate is veggies, with only a quarter being meat and a quarter grains.
- Absolutely no eating after 8pm!
- Absolutely no eating while watching movies or TV.
Why losing weight sucks:
- I crave food all the time.
- I’m tired after the gym, and occasionally get dizzy after working out (this is part of my heart-rate being higher than it should be, which means… y’know, I need to exercise, as told by my doctor. Don’t worry.)
- I’m so sore sometimes. Ugh.
- I have a headache because I’m not eating sugar.
- I can’t participate in eating the fun food that everyone else gets at parties. And sometimes I feel rude for refusing food that people have made to serve me (and others).
- I want to do it by myself, but I can’t.
- My husband’s attempts to help tend to offend me because I already know what he’s telling me and my pride gets hurt. I need to work on that, too.
- I miss chocolate. And barbeque chips.
Why losing weight will be worth it, in the end:
- I will weigh less than my husband! (BIG reason.)
- I’ll be able to finally wear skinny jeans without them falling halfway down my bum when I bend over or sit down.
- Pencil skirts won’t ride up funny.
- I’ll be able to hike those mountains without stopping every five minutes for a breather and wanting to die by the time we get to the top.
- I’ll have formed some really good habits for life.
- I’ll be able to indulge in junk food without feeling like I’m adding a few more un-needed pounds to my hips.
- I won’t feel so chubby while wearing pants. Or shorts. Or swimsuits.
- I’ll be able to raise a healthy family
- Maybe baby weight after babies won’t be so hard to lose
- I will be taking care of my body as a temple of God
- I may be able to avoid the diabetes and obesity that plague my family
There are many more reasons that I’ll come up with, I know, but those are the main ones. I think.
Also: a picture, so that someday I can do the whole before-and-after glory post.
26 Comments
Emily
I’m cheering you on! I’ve lost weight in the past as well, and have a major event coming up that I’m hoping to lose some weight for. I had a calender to keep me on track, but since it’s been a while since I lost the weight, in addition to gaining a couple pounds back, I’ve run terribly off course and feel like it’s hopeless on occasion. You mentioned you didn’t know what to eat for breakfast, and you probably already know this, but I just thought I’d mention that eating eggs, or meals high in protein to start off my day, are a great way to last you until your snack or lunch. I do at least three eggs, scrambled, or however you like them, and find it works pretty great. Hope that helps! Keep fighting!
Eccentric Owl
Aw, good luck losing your weight! I really want to get a calendar I can mark for every day I conquer, it’s really motivating to visually have a reminder of how many days you’ve won in the fight against unhealthiness!
I wish I could eat eggs! They tend to make my stomach turn, though (I may be intolerant to them). I have found that smoothies hold me for quite a while, but I get tired of smoothies every day of the week. Hehe. I’ll figure it out! Thank you for the encouragement!
Sarah Whiting
So now that I’ve eaten half a cake in under a week I’m pretty sure I need to go on a very strict diet. (It was a costco cake too. And I had wine with it every evening.)
Eccentric Owl
Oh, man, I would do the same thing! That sounds so delicious. I ate half a bowl of chocolate-covered almonds last week, and THAT was a bad decision. Sigh.
Just think of all the money you might save by eating healthy and not buying junk foods!
Laura Burnson Bruer
Greek yogurt for breakfast. Add weight training at least 15 mins to your workout. Google weight training vs cardio. Burns weight off faster. Facebook inspirations : healthy wage , heathers fitspiration, and fairly fit female. I constantly want to share their posts :). Love Always!
Eccentric Owl
Yogurt for breakfast is the one thing I do know to eat! I need to start weight training; maybe today after work I’ll do that! Also, you’re one of the most inspiring weight-loss people I know!
Love you!
Jenny A
Hi Kristina!
I actually first found your blog by searching online for pictures of people my same height and weight. It’s a weird thing that I do every now and then when I start to feel self-conscious. The first blog post I read of yours was the one containing your summer-y pictures and a desire for weight loss.
At the time I was about 162 and 5′ 6″. Today I’m 152. I am AWFUL about going to the gym, mostly because I work a crazy stressful job and just want to get home and zone out or sleep 😐
There are four big things that have helped me, without having to work too hard (i.e. without having to starve myself or workout constantly):
1. No sugar – My goal has been zero sugar, but that is hard; especially when plain coffee just tastes yuck without it. I get maybe 15 grams per day. I think this is how I have lost the most weight. As American’s we are addicted to the stuff.
2. Healthy Snacks – Snacking is hard for me too. I’ll eat super well throughout the day, and then I get home from work and if I don’t have healthy snacks around I end up eating the worst foods! I try to keep a good stock of walnuts, cashews (no salt), veggies and hummus, and hot green tea.
3. Portion Control – My boyfriend tells me that my meals look like snacks to him. It’s not because I am starving myself though, but because of our inability to manage our portions! I read somewhere that there is something like 200 calories in 1/2 cup of plain pasta. Crazy! My meals are small, with a few snacks scattered around. If I’m hungry I eat, but I am really careful about it.
4. No food after 8pm – I was eating dinner at 9:30pm was and in bed by 11pm. Not good for the waistline…
I wish you the very best, and I KNOW that you will see a difference just by making some small changes. Getting into the habit just takes a little time.
I know how you feel too, because I’ve been there and am still there today. I’ve always been curvy, between 140-165, the high end of which makes me feel chubby and uncomfortable in my clothes even though people say I look fine.
With that, I think you look lovely. Being healthy is important though, so I wish you success!
Eccentric Owl
Hi Jenny!
I totally understand; I’ve done that too. It’s helpful to know that there are other women out there of the same size and you’re not the only one!
Those four tips are the best! I agree about sugar- Americans are very addicted.I think it really helps to cook everything, because then you can control exactly what you put in it! I’m also used to cooking without sugar as my mom was allergic and so was I.
I totally forgot to put the no eating after 8pm one on my plan of attack, but that’s definitely another thing I will be doing! I also have a bad habit of snacking after 8pm (usually chips or popcorn) and it really is a terrible habit!
Thank you!
Amanda
I feel the same way when looking for inspiration of dieting and working out. All you tend to see stories of people who have been successful which is really great, but I also want to hear about the struggles they have had, just to know that it happens to everyone. Best of luck to you on your journey!
Eccentric Owl
I agree! And not that it’s not inspirational for people to post their success stories, but it’s really encouraging to know you’re not the only one struggling! And I also want to know what helped other people stick to it in the moments when they were just ready to give up and be done!
Emma semple
I am going through exactly the same thing. I also get dizzy at the gym. I love sweet treats and carbs and eating more than I should. About this time last year I tried and failed. I didn’t lose any weight at all in a month despite going to the gym every day (almost) because I couldn’t control myself when it came to food. Now I have gotten better at the food part and am ready to tackle the gym. It’s so hard. Some days I am so keen for a chocolate biscuit that I just about cry because I know I shouldn’t. Stick with it. We both can and get exactly where we want to be, eventually. Looking and feeling even more fantastic than ever. Good luck. I look forward to hearing about your progress!
Eccentric Owl
I know how you feel! Some days I just want to give up because it seems hopeless, but it’s not! I’m SO encouraged by everyone commenting that they’re going through the same struggles. I think together, we can definitely do it! I hope you reach your goals and find that eventually you love eating healthy and exercising! I know it happens. 🙂
Salazar
While in college I tried to lose the notorious “Freshman 15” and was never very successful, because I was restricting myself too much. Then I went home for the summer between college and grad school, and for two months ate a lot of home-cooked meals, fresh fruits, fresh vegetables, fresh everything, and my weight just settled down. Now I eat what I want and don’t worry about it, though I do need to be more active. What I’m trying to say is that: don’t beat yourself up over a number. Your body will probably find a weight it’s comfortable with and stay there. The important thing is to keep yourself fit and healthy (which I’m not. I’m terribly out of shape.) Good luck!
Eccentric Owl
Fresh veggies and fruits and home cooking definitely help! I’m very used to cooking all of my own food, so that’s not a big problem. And I’m not beating myself up over a number, truly. 🙂 But I do have goals and have always had goals, and I could be a whole lot healthier!
Jamie Rose
You can do it! I hate how I feel after a cardio workout, so I definitely understand. Maybe try some weight lifting in there too? I find that it’s more fun for me and it’s a good activity for couples! And of course it’s really good for you too.
Eccentric Owl
I wish it would go away immediately! I know after two weeks or so of going to the gym, I start feeling more energized than exhausted after cardio, so at least it goes away eventually! I want to try weight-training soon!
Alexis Monroy
Hi Kristina! So when reading this blog I know exactly what you’re going through. Being tired, headaches and everything else..I am too,currently, trying to lose and tone. My goal is to have my tummy down by May 28 which is my birthday. This post has really inspired me EVEN MORE to go out and workout even harder! Thank you so much for posting and cannot wait to read more and see your progress 🙂 thanks again and good luck!
Eccentric Owl
I’m so glad it inspired you! My goal is to lose 10 pounds (totally doable) by my birthday in April, so it’s funny that we both have the same goals! Good luck reaching yours!
Runes and Rhinestones
I’m the other way around! I don’t snack, but my portion sizes are a bit dodgy and I tend to go a bit crazy on meals because I love cooking and make some pretty tasty stuff, even if I do say so myself. My other half doesn’t help either because although he’s a bit overweight he doesn’t mind, and he has a huge appetite.
I also feel the pain of drinking so much water you’re always in the bathroom! It’s healthy, but such a pain to constantly have to leave off what you’re doing to go pee 🙂
Anyway, best of luck with the diet/exercise. I’d love to join a gym, but at the moment I just do weight training at home!
Eccentric Owl
I’m right there with you! I love eating, period, and if something is particularly tasty I’ll eat till I’m full and then get more just because I want it. It’s such a terrible habit! Ah, I wish food wasn’t so tempting sometimes! 🙂
And peeing all the time= pretty annoying sometimes. But I do always feel better on the days when I drink lots of water!
Good luck with your weight training!
Trousers and Truffles
I like your planning! Fail to plan, plan to fail… I’m in it with you 🙂
Eccentric Owl
I know! I used to think I could do this without planning, but that definitely doesn’t work. If there’s no plan, there’s nothing to fall back on when you’re feeling tempted!
Kate Brown
Hi Kristina, I feel I should share this with you.
I am 43 and have been up and down with my weight for the last 20 years. My weight has ranged from 126lbs to 164lbs. 8 years ago when I got up to 164lbs I decided to try Weight Watchers which really worked for me and I reached my goal of 136lbs in less than 12 weeks. Over the last 7 years on and off I have gone back to doing Weight Watchers but mainly by doing it myself using the online facility rather than attending meetings. I have not done Weight Watchers for the past 18 months. However this is not an advert for Weight Watchers.
What Weight Watchers has taught me is that I do not need to diet but to change my lifestyle and eating habits forever. That by planning meals and doing some form of exercise in my life I can stay at a healthy weight and feel so much better. I gave up smoking 6 years ago which has also made me feel so much better. I am currently at 147lbs and could do with losing 7 or 8lbs but at the moment in the cold weather I think the extra pounds keep me a little warmer, ha. I gave up my job a year ago which was office based so meant I was sitting down a lot of the time. I now run an online handbags and jewellery business and work from home so on sunny days I power walk with my parcels to the mail office which there and back is only 20 minutes when I walk fast but I sure work up a sweat. I also try a do a few DVD excercise sessions a week at home. I thought when I gave up my job I would put weight on but if anything I have lost a few pounds which I think is because I am more active doing lots of cleaning around the house all the time. Diets do work but can be short term if you are not careful. I think the best thing is to have plenty of PMA (positive mental attitude) and you can achieve the best results and also to think to yourself that this is for life. I am constantly thinking about my weight and what I eat. It can be a real battle sometimes but I think as long as I keep being bothered about it and thinking about it I should be ok. I hope I haven’t gone on too much.
I wish you well with your task ahead and will keep an eye out to see how you are doing. You are already off to a good start by writing down what you are going to do. Good luck! I’m now off to power walk to the Mail Office 🙂 Katie B x
Eccentric Owl
Thank you for that encouraging story, Katie! I’m definitely not planning a “diet” diet, but a lifestyle change, and to teach myself to moderate my portions (that’s one of my BIGGEST problems, stopping eating when I’m full!). None of my diet change plans are plans that can’t be carried over to lifelong habits, and once I’ve gotten past the thirty days of no sugar and white flour (to cleanse my body of those cravings and kick start the habits to choose healthier options) it’ll definitely be more of having these things in moderation!
You didn’t go on too much at all! I’m so glad you shared, it’s so encouraging to hear everyone’s stories!
Comy
You have it all figured out! I can only say – good luck. 🙂
I am a chocolate lover too, so, I have a little tip for those cravings – eating fruit instead. Since I love apples (I could eat them all day every day), whenever I feel the urge to eat sugar bombs, I grab an apple instead. 😀 Not recommended in the evenings.
Eccentric Owl
Haha! Yes, I have been doing that– I found a list of “when you’re craving (whatever bad thing), your body actually needs (nutritious thing)” a while ago, and I want to find it because it was pretty great. But mostly, if I’m craving foods I tend to drink water and that helps, or yes, eat fruit! I love fruit.